I was afraid.

Sure I’d dressed up as a few anime characters back during my college days, like Gendo Ikari and Trowa Barton. And I’d spoken in public a lot of times: speeches, oratorical contests, debates, and the occasional stage play or four. But I was afraid. I’d never done both at the same time. I mostly cosplayed at private gatherings. And it’s one thing to act out a role on stage, and another to come out and say, “I enjoy dressing up as fictional characters.” My employers would soon find something more than a little interesting if they Googled my name.

Costume was shaping up to be a problem child, too. The kindly old lady who had stitched it up was apparently a better dressmaker than a tailor. The collar didn’t close right, and the Velcro patches chafed my neck like crazy. The sleeves were too loose. The gold corners in front weren’t level. I had it sent back for repairs once, and then sent it to another place for more alterations. Rotch wasn’t kidding when she said commissioned costumes sometimes had major mistakes.

Wearing contacts was an entirely new and somewhat unpleasant experience, since I’d never needed to wear contacts or glasses. And wearing a wig was like wearing a hairy and unruly hat.

Also, considering the resistance my opinions have sometimes encountered, I was bracing myself for a battle. People had gone so far as to warn me of possible physical violence.

But that didn’t happen.

And a stranger thing happened: The moment I stepped into Megamall, I stopped being afraid.

Maybe it was because all around me were people in the same boat. There was a sea of humanity, some people in costume, some people there to support them, and some people to gawk and snicker. Or maybe the spirit of Lelouch descended upon me. Who knows?

I managed to obtain my Guest VIP pass without pain or hassle, although it did require me to stand behind a middle-aged couple complaining to Information about the long lines for a couple of minutes, while patient staff members listened to their suggestions. I decided to be as pleasant as possible. Little point in adding to their worries.

I was greeted at the Megatrade Conference Room by Mark Poa, who appeared to be as professional and efficient as the impression he gives off in his emails. In fact the entire operation struck me as professional and efficient. We arranged a few last minute preparations for my presentation (just my webpage and the logo of my webcomic The Vigilant) and then I shook hands with Marcelle Fabie aka Kel, whom my readers may remember as the host I had heckled back at Cosplay Fusion. He was passing the time playing Dissidia on his PSP.

After exchanging some friendly chatter, I said, “I wonder if we should expect any trouble. Especially from You-Know-Who.”

“Well, this is just a panel about blogging,” he replied. “Nothing controversial about that.”

What is it about me and controversy, anyway?

At this point the people started to file in, a lot of them avid readers of the blog. To those people: Hi guys! Thanks for turning out in droves to support me! I really appreciate it.

Rotch arrived after transacting business with my wife outside (business involving the exchange of cash and pinky:st dolls) and we all prepared for the panel.

We were all told to give short speeches about our blogs. Which I didn’t realize was part of the panel format (having made assumptions in my mind about panel discussions), but since I was perfectly prepared to wing it it was no problem. Meann Ortiz from the New Worlds Alliance introduced us one by one before our talks.

First up was Rotch aka Magnetic Rose, who had several orphaned mangas with her as an incentive for people to ask questions. Considering how rowdy the audience had gotten, she probably didn’t need to do it, but it was a nice bonus. As expected she was quite the firebrand. She talked about her experiences with UP Tomo Kai and studying in Japan. She clarified that anyone from the Philippines who wanted to join the Regional Cosplay Championships could do so, just that only one team would have their travel and accomodations paid for. (Which team would that be, though?) She talked about blogging for MTV. She defended blogging product endorsements, which I thought wasn’t really an issue since I firmly believe in getting paid for writing anyway, although I could see how some people would criticize such a stance. She took charge. She didn’t even need a microphone.

Next up was me. I pretty much rambled my way though my talk. I explained what an Otaking was, in the context of Otaku no Video. (Someone who has decided to play the role of otaku to the hilt despite societal pressure to conform.) I talked about Tags, not Categories. (Tags include, categories exclude.) I talked about Cosplayers vs. Cosplay Fans vs. Models (to some good-natured catcalling from the audience). And I talked about dealing with trolls. (Troll them back, and treat it as a game.) And I plugged my webcomic. (Read The Vigilant!)

Finally Kel spoke. He talked about being a deejay and a magician. (He’s a mentalist by specialization, something that totally fascinates me.) I especially enjoyed the part where he talked about separating his personal blog from his magic blog. Also, he was apparently cosplaying as Ryan Evans from High School Musical.

Finally the actual panel discussion started. We talked about blogging as self-publishing. I asserted that it blew the doors wide open for anyone with something to say to speak their minds, and that it was up to the Internet at large to vote whether your opinion resonated or not, by reading your blog instead of someone else’s. Kel made the interesting point that blogging allowed him to redefine his identity as a magician. And Rotch enlightened us on the perks of being a blogger for international media. There was a brief exchange between Rotch and Kel about wannabe political bloggers and blog event dilettantes that flew right over my head, since I don’t actually attend political blog events. And we all had a good laugh at a certain Boy’s expense.

This wasn’t so bad at all, I thought to myself! The discussion was lively and not at all hostile, like it seemed to be at the Mini-Summit. Or at the very least it was civil. That’s really the most you can ask for sometimes, and this was much more than that.

In fact the discussion was so lively that we went overtime, with the participants of the next panel (The Society of Young Voice Actors) milling into the conference room before we were done.

So after the panel ended, and after a nice lady whose name completely escapes me took my cell phone number in case she wanted to contact me for ‘voice acting’, Rotch hurried to the Mech Cafe which she was in charge of, Kel stayed for the Voice Acting panel, and I swallowed hard and stepped out of the conference room, in costume, and into the main convention hall.

And into utter chaos.

(to be continued)